


Haunting Me

by mywildestdreamings



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/M, medium!reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2019-02-07 21:53:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12850278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mywildestdreamings/pseuds/mywildestdreamings
Summary: Being a medium had never been easy.  Since age three, you had been able to communicate with spirits and you could sense emotions.  You did your best to help people but it wasn’t always easy.  Neither was living in New York City.  After a spirit saved you life during the Battle of New York, you had been visited by him again and again.  As those visits got more frequent, he starts to visit you in your dreams and you’re asked to help an Avenger deal with a recent loss.  That’s when everything takes a dramatic turn and everything changes when you find out who really had been haunting you.Loki had been a trickster all his life.  While he fell from the Bifrost, he made a deal to get himself what he’d wanted all along: a realm and a crown.  What he didn’t know was what it would cost him: his freedom.  He saved your life and it cost him his chance at ruling a realm.  But his visits to you allowed him to realize that maybe he could find something better than a throne.  It won’t be easy for him to make amends and there are plenty of people in the universe who won’t believe he changed his ways.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: None really, unless you count Loki creeping a little. But in a not as creepy as it could be way!  
> Notes: And so it begins! I am currently writing part 8 of this so I’m hoping to have it completed soon but I couldn’t wait to post part one. I hope you all enjoy!

You felt it again. You felt _him again_. It seemed it was always at night these days. He favored coming to you when you were alone, particularly late at night when you were readying yourself for bed. Tonight was no different. Your routine remained the same, even when you felt his presence. Brush teeth. Wash face. Make sure you had lunch made for work the next day. As you moved about your bed, adjusting the sheets and blankets, you let out a long sigh. 

“I don’t know why you won’t talk to me. I’m probably one of the one people in the world you can actually speak to.”

Silence. Typical. 

Turning, you glanced over your shoulder to the corner by the window where your mother’s rocking chair was. You sensed him there, watching. It wasn’t unsettling or disruptive, more protective. He never made you feel uncomfortable. Normal people would have given up by now. Then again, you were far from normal. 

At age three, you fell down the stairs and hit your head hard. Hard enough to land you in a coma for six weeks. When you woke up, there was a man on your bed. He’d died in that hospital and wanted to talk to someone. You reminded him of his granddaughter. That accident had made you a medium. While other kids your age had imaginary friends, you had your ghosts. Most were sweet, wanting closure of some kind. Others weren’t and you dealt with them in kind. 

This spirit, however, this one was different. It had been around for a while. The first time you felt him was when he saved your life. You were in Grand Central Station when the aliens attacked New York City. Hell of a time you need your computer looked at, but you’d been desperate enough to hit up the Apple Store. One of the large alien whale-like things crashed through the building. Debris was falling everywhere and one section of the roof was heading straight for you. An unseen force pulled you away from it and hid you safely under a table. Since then, it visited you with increasing regularity. Enough that you knew it was a male spirit.

“Alight, fine,” you said with another sigh. “Don’t talk to me. But at least do me the courtesy of not coming at bedtime. It’s a little creepy.” While that wasn’t entirely true, you said it anyway. He made you feel safe. Whenever he visited, you felt calm, as if this spirit was supposed to be around you. Perhaps it was someone you had met before or a soul that was attracted to yours. Stranger things had crossed your path over the years. That didn’t change the fact that it would be nice if he spoke to you. Or showed his face. A name would be appreciated. 

You sat on your bed and finished up your nightly routine. Lotion on your hands and feet. Setting your alarm for the morning. And finally was the tray of pills. Every night, you took your multivitamins and allergy medication. You slid between your cool sheets and turned on the nature sounds you used to help you fall asleep. “Night, mystery man. Maybe tomorrow you’ll finally talk to me.” They were words you’d spoken before. Like most nights, they were murmured as you drifted off, knowing he was still watching over you as always. 

Once your breathing evened out, and he knew you were asleep, the bed dipped beside you as if someone had sat down. A cool breeze caressed your face as a man, one with dark hair that fell against his shoulders in soft waves, materialized. His eyes were intense as he gazed down at you. Leaning in, he pressed a feather-light kiss to your forehead, not wanting to disturb you. “Sleep well, darling. I wish you’d dream of me.” With that, he vanished as suddenly as he’d arrived. You turned in your slumber, reaching for the now empty side of the bed and curling your hand around nothing. 

In the morning, when you woke, the other side of the bed was ice cold. It didn’t strike you as stranger. Your air conditioner had been on all night. Stretching, you got up and moved to the bathroom to get ready for your day. A hot shower did wonders for your muscles and you dried your hair before applying some light makeup. The entire time you got ready, you were alone. You put on a dress and some sandals and headed to work.

One of the things you loved most about being a medium was helping people. There were plenty of people who knew what you could do and how you could bring some comfort to loved ones who needed the same closure the spirits did. There were also people who called upon you when the spirits were not so friendly. Violent spirits needed to be dealt with swiftly lest they linger and make things worse. You had your own people to call when they were beyond your abilities. It didn’t happen often and for that, you were grateful. Since your true work would preclude you from a “normal” day job, you had found work at a cafe. The owner was well aware of what you could do as you helped a local priest rid his apartment of a malevolent spirit a few years prior. You had also helped Nico communicate with his wife who had passed away. He knew you were a dedicated worker in the cafe as much as you were committed to helping people. 

“Morning, Y/N!” he greeted you as you walked in. 

The smells of cookies baking in the oven filled the space and you couldn’t help the smile on your face. That was definitely a perk of working there: unlimited coffee and delicious treats. “Hey, Nico. How’s it been?”

“Pretty slow, to be honest. Might have you close up yourself today.” He wiped down the espresso machine. “I have a date tonight.”

“Look at you go! Amelia would be so happy.” His wife had expressed a fierce desire for him to find love again. What you hadn’t told him was that she wanted him to find someone to take care of him. He spent all his time at the cafe and someone needed to make sure he had clean clothes and ate real food once in a while. Which was why you had often “accidentally” made too much food and brought him the leftovers. 

An hour or so into your shift, Nico left you to get ready for his evening. You didn’t mind at all. A few college students had breezed in and out, ordering lattes. The rhythm of steaming milk and pouring espresso shots was naturally soothing to you. Most people were kind when they came in, and those that weren’t were kept to a minimum. Waving as one of your regulars left with his coffee, you looked away just as three men entered the cafe.

When you glanced up, you recognized them immediately. You chose to say nothing, wanting to keep your expression schooled. After all, you were a born and bred New Yorker; celebrities were common place and you liked to respect their privacy and treat them like any other person. For you, that meant with kindness and respect. Still, Captain America, Falcon, and the Winter Soldier all standing in front of the counter looking up at the menu board above your head was surreal.

“What can I get you guys?”

Steve Rogers was the first one to step forward to order. Smiling, you moved to the register, marker in hand to write on the cup. “Just a latte please.” As your hand hovered over the different sizes, He amended his order, sheepish smile on his face. “Large.”

“Anything to eat?”

“No, thank you.” Steve offered you a smile, one that would make you weak in the knees. Oh, that was dangerous. 

“Name for the cup?” The good captain’s cheeks flushed and you couldn’t help but chuckle a little at his reaction. “You want me to just put Steve?”

“Yeah, thanks.” Steve paired for his drink and stood aside for you to take Sam’s order next. The cup for his mocha was put beside Steve’s. 

Last up was Bucky. His eyes were sad and you could sense that life had not been easy for the handsome man. Though there were no spirits around him now, you knew he had ghosts in his past, ones that still haunted him. It was in his aura and it radiated off him so much that you had to say something. Reaching out, you took his hand in yours. You smoothed your thumb over the leather covering his metal hand. “Don’t you worry, hun. Any of those pesky things come at you again, you come where and I’ll give you a talking to. You are not what they made you and you are more than atoning for it.”

He just blinked at you for a moment. Steve and Sam stood by and watched you, hovering near their friend. “What do you mean, doll?” Bucky asked after a few moments, his voice a little quieter. 

You smiled at him. “I mean that you don’t have to let the ghosts get you down. Everyone has them at one point or another, but if you want them to leave you alone, I’m happy to set them straight. You’ve got a good heart and you do so much to help the people of the world with the Avengers. The spirits need to know that.”

“How—?” Steve looked confused and it was your turn for your cheeks to warm. 

“I’m a medium. I usually don’t go broadcasting it but Bucky here, his aura? It was intense. I couldn’t help myself from saying something. Not when I can help.” You shrugged and turned your attention back to the man with the metal arm. “What can I get you, darling? It’s on the house.”

“How come Bucky gets free coffee?” Sam protested. Steve smacked him in the back of the head and you laughed at them. They were all good men, ones who had each other’s backs. 

“You come to me with trouble, mister, and we’ll see about giving you a mocha on the house.” It made them all laugh. Once Bucky had placed his order, you bustled about making their drinks. Each one was crafted with care because you know that would mean something to the Avengers sitting in the corner of the otherwise empty little cafe. Rather than call out their drinks like you normally would have, you put them on a tray and brought the cups over to the men, three chocolate chip cookies on plates for them as well. Might as well treat them well. 

As you approached them, you realized they were deep in conversation about someone they worked with, someone who was struggling with loss. “He’s taking it pretty hard, harder than any of use would have expected,” Steve said, thoughtful.

“His mom I get but his brother? He tried to take over the world once. Not sure any of us are losing sleep over him not being around anymore,” Sam offered, leaning back in his chair. “Pretty sure lots of people will rest easy with him gone.”

Bucky was silent but you could feel how uncomfortable he was radiating off him. Whoever they were talking about, he was deep in thought about something. 

“Here you go, gents. Brought you a little treat too, so you can stop pouting about having to pay for your drink, Sammy.” You set down their cups and placed the cookies in front of each of them. “You boys let me know if you need anything else.”

Bucky smiled at you. “Thanks, doll.” You were right to call him handsome before. That grin of his was heart stopping and his eyes were intense but kind. You had this urge to find him a nice girl, set him up. Someone who had been through so much deserved someone to make him happy. That was a thought you were going to have to save for another day.

You went back behind the counter and cleaned up, wiping down every surface and the applicants while humming along to the music you had playing over the speakers. The cafe would be closing soon enough and you wanted to make it as painless for yourself as possible. There weren’t likely to be many customers coming in at this point and you were happy to let the Avengers have the back corner to themselves.

With your head in the fridge checking for any expired food, you hadn’t heard Bucky come back to up to the counter with the plates until he cleared his throat. “Where can I put these?” he asked, holding them up as you turned to look at him. 

“You can leave them on the counter, sugar,” you replied with a bright smile. “Thanks.” You’d get to them in a second. Your attention returned to your task at hand as you pulled out the few things that would need to be gotten rid of at closing.

“Can I ask you something?”

Bucky was still standing by the counter and you wiped your hands on your apron. “What’s on your mind, hun?”

“Why do you to that?” He tilted his head, curiosity bouncing off him in waves. 

Leaning back against the counter behind you, you loosely crossed your arms. “Do what?”

“Call me handsome or sugar or hun or whatever.”

Shrugging, you pushed yourself forward and leaned your hands on the counter, bringing you closer to him. “In my experience, there are people in the world who would use a little extra sweetness. Life deals people a rough hand but we’re even more horrible to each other. I’m happy to try to help however I can. If that means that I call people things like hun and sugar, then that’s what I do. You seem like the kind of person I’m talking about so I’m happy to remind you that you’re a good person. Simple as that.”

“That’s it. We are coming here every day.”

You couldn’t help but laugh and he smiled warmly at you. Oh yeah, you had to find him someone. He deserved more than a little sweetness in his life. “You boys are always welcome here. Even if it’s nearly closing.” You’d never object to taking care of the heroes that were responsible for saving the world more times than you likely knew. There were the kind of people who deserved it.

“Listen, doll, I appreciate that and the caffeine and the sugar, but I’m wondering if I could potentially ask a favor of you.”

“What kind of favor?”

“Well, you’re a medium, right?” At your nod, he continued. “We have a friend. In the last couple of months, he lost his mother and his brother. Pretty suddenly and traumatically, to be honest. I know Sam could care less about the brother cause he wasn’t exactly a good guy like us, but loss is hard.”

“I know that all too well.”

He ran a hand through his hair, a little nervous now. “You think maybe you could help him get some closure?”

“Sure thing. I’m happy to help if he wants it.” You chuckled a little. “Honestly, surprise y’all believed me.”

Bucky grinned and you could tell he was more comfortable with you now. “Well, Steve and I are super soldiers. Sam wears a jet pack and flys around. Our ability to believe things is pretty strong.” 

You laughed again. “Let me give you my number and we can figure something out. Might wanna tell him what I can do before I meet him.” After exchanging numbers, he went back to his table and the men got ready to leave. You took the plates back to the kitchen with the plates. You came back just as they were near the door.

“Thanks again,” Steve called as they headed out. 

“Anytime!” You waved and headed to the door behind them to to lock up and flip around the closed sign. It felt like you accomplished something today and that was a very good feeling. When you emptied out the tip jar, there was fifty bucks in there that hadn’t been before. Smiling to yourself, you realized just how sweet those men were. You found yourself looking forward to their call to help their friend and then they next stopped in for a java fix. Today had been a good day, an interesting day. 

 

That night, you returned to your apartment with your favorite take out and wine. You were happy to toe off your toes and relax with your Netflix queue. There was something about being home that was so soothing after a long day, even when it was a good day. It was time to ignore your phone and kick back. Setting your food on the coffee table, you made your way to your bedroom to change. You pulled out your favorite shorts and a tank top. It was time to get comfortable.

When you returned to the living room, your spirit friend was back. For a moment, you ignored him as you shivered. You hadn’t remembered leaving the air conditioner on when you left for work. The wall unit was off. Whatever was making the room cold wasn’t the machinery and wasn’t something you could control. Turning, you addressed the room. “Is there a reason you are making it cold in here? Not that I don’t appreciate the fact that I’m keeping my electric bill down...”. Trailing off, you looked for any kind of response from the spirit. Nothing. 

“Fine.” Going to the kitchen, you grabbed a wine glass and the bottle opener before returning to the couch. Your food had been taking out of the bag and set up how you liked it. Your favorite fuzzy blanket was on the couch, draped over the arm, just waiting for you. Sighing, you plopped down. “Thank you,” you relented softly. “But it would be really nice to know your name.”

Silence was the only response. It was, after all, what you were used to, so for now you let it go. Curled up as you were, the presence was comforting and you weren’t going to complain. Not tonight. Not after the day you’d had. Good days were always appreciated. Your mind drifted from the show you were watching to who ever the friend of the Avengers was. Perhaps it was another team member. You didn’t think it was Bucky. At this point, you were sure he would have mentioned to to you when he asked. He already knew were you were going to do anything you could to help the man. Or at least, you hoped he did.

You drifted off on the couch. As soon as you were asleep, once again, the man appeared. Leaning over you, he tucked you in with care, covering your body with the blanket that had been beside you. He kissed your forehead and moved to sit in the overstuffed armchair you often used to curl up with a good book. A leather bound book materialized in his hands and he opened to a marked page. 

The sight of you, peaceful in your slumber, distracted him more than he expected. It was something he was not used to, having a mortal woman such as yourself capturing his attention so completely. With a sigh he closed the book and it vanished. The man stood and smoothed his cool fingers over your forehead. The motion had him in your dreams. 

You stood on a beach, the waves gently breaking over your toes. The skirt of the long dress you wore was damp at the hem but you didn’t seem to mind. Since your back was to him, he assumed you didn’t know he was there. You didn’t turn or seem to sense his presence. A breeze stirred the skirt as you gazed out at the rising sun. You seemed even more at peace than you did on your couch.

“I was wondering you were going to show yourself.” The man jumped, started by the fact that you were aware of his being behind you. It made you giggle but you still didn’t turn. “I always know when you’re near, you know. You’ve been a constant in my life for a while now, haven’t you?”

“I suppose I have.” He moved towards you and the water moved over his toes. When he looked down, his shoes had been removed and his pant legs rolled up. “Did you do this?”

“It’s my dream, isn’t it?”

At last, you turned to look at him and you were stunned. It wasn’t something you could hide, nor did you want to because you could finally see him. After two years, you could see the man who’d saved your life. And he was handsome, his features striking in a way you didn’t often see. His dark hair moved in the breeze and you longed to reach out and touch the strands, wondering if they were soft. The clothes he wore, a suit made of fine material from what you could see, were black, like his hair. You had altered his look so that his pants would stay dry and his sleeves were rolled up to the elbows, making him appear more casual. His jacket was unnecessary and you happened to like how he looked like this. There was something familiar about his face, something you couldn’t place. It was going to bug you.

“Why did you come to me? After two years?”

“Does it bother you that I continue to visit you?”

You looked back out at the ocean. “It’s interesting to me that you avoid the question. Perhaps I should ask why you saved me during the Battle of New York.” 

He slid his hands into his pockets, the movement making drawing your eye for a moment before you both looked out over the water. “It is interesting to me that you didn’t ask how I did so, merely why.”

Your shoulders lifted in a shrug. “I have been a medium for most of my life. I have seen far stranger things than a spirit moving a person out of the way. But I haven’t met you. Not in my life. So why save me?”

“It would have pained me to see a creature so beautiful taken down in such a way.”

There was no helping your laugh. It was not the response you’d had expected and yet, it didn’t surprise you much. He seemed like someone who would flatter to get his way. Or to distract. Still, you couldn’t help but feel that he was being sincere. That struck you as odd. He really did find you beautiful but surely that couldn’t be his only motivation.

“Can I at least know your name?”

He turned to you. “If I told you that, you would know me in an instant, my darling, and I’m afraid that would most certainly change your opinion of me.”

More honesty. It was something you could appreciate. “What am I supposed to call you?”

It was your turn to face him and his eyes met yours. The blue-green orbs were intense, his expression something you weren’t used to seeing directed at you. You held your breath. You didn’t know what to say to him when he looked at her like that, as if there was an unspoken question that hun in the air between you. He was your savior, your companion, but would could you call him if he refused to tell you his name?

You woke with a start and you were alone in your living room. The television had turned itself off, leaving you in the dark. You couldn’t sense the man and you bit your lip as you sat up. Something told you that there was much more to him than what little he’d shared. And that things were changing.


	2. Chapter 2

Over the next few days, the spirit was missing. He wasn’t around, at least not that you could feel. That left you unsettled. He was almost always there, even if it was just on the fringes of your awareness. Not even in your dreams did he come to you. Now that he had visited you in your subconscious, you wanted him to come back to you. Maybe it had something to do with how attracted to him you were, but you couldn’t let yourself get attached to a spirit like this. It wasn’t healthy and one of the things you had sworn you wouldn’t do when you met your first cute ghost.

It was tempting to try to look for him online, to see if you could find his obituary, to Lear something about him. Never before had you done that, as if it would invade the privacy of the dead. It was another vow you had made as a medium: that you would respect the dead as you would a living person. That was something most spirits were missing in the afterlife and you weren’t about to add to it.

After the first night, you found yourself missing your mystery man. You didn’t think something bad happened to him but perhaps your conversation had prompted him to cross over. For some reason you could not, or would not, name, that thought broke your heart. 

Four days after you had your dream, you were leaving work when your phone rang. “Hello?”

“Hey, doll. It’s Bucky.”

“Hey, sugar! How are you doing?” You started down the street towards the subway that would take you to your apartment. There was a little bounce to your step, one that had been missing over the past several days. 

“I’m alright. Sorry we haven’t been in again. Had a mission and that kept us out of the city for the last couple of days.” 

You laughed. “You don’t have to apologize to me for saving the world. I’m just appreciative of what y’all do so I understand the absences.”

“That’s real nice of you, Y/N. Not everyone is so kind to us.”

“Well, I happen to think they’re all idiots.”

It was his turn to laugh and it made you smile as you hung back from heading down to the station below. “I was wondering when you would be free to try to help our friend.”

“Oh, yeah! Um, I work the next couple of days but what about Sunday? I work early and then I’m off on Sunday so I would have plenty of time to help you guys out.”

“I think that’ll work. I’ll have to check with him and then get back to you.” 

“Sounds good to me, Bucky. Listen, I’m about to grab the subway, but call or text or whatever and I’ll pencil you in. If it doesn’t work, we can always compare calendars and find a better time.”

He laughed again. “Not sure he knows what a calendar is, doll, but I get you. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Later, hun!” Hanging up, you bounced down the steps, pleased that he had reached out to you. It always felt good to help people and it was certainly a good distraction from wondering what happened to your spirit. The subway was crowded but it didn’t matter when you felt this good. You stood, leaning against the pole as you rode to your stop. Normally, you would have been enjoying for favorite music through your headphones, but today, you didn’t need it. 

Back at your apartment, you pulled out the ingredients to make your favorite dinner. Working in the kitchen was something you enjoyed. There was a rhythm to cooking, one that was peaceful after a long day or calming when you had too much energy. Today, you needed to work off some of the excitement you had from hearing from Bucky. 

 

“Do you always visit this beach in your dreams?”

You were sitting at the water’s edge, the foamy surf coming up over your legs. Your outfit was different from the previous time he visited you in your dreams, a pair of soft shorts and a loose tee shirt, one than hung off your shoulder. Looking at the man who appeared beside you, you shook your head. His suit was the same, all black, the jacket unbuttoned as his hands slid into his pockets. You leaned back in the sand, face tiling up to the warmth of the sunshine. Your hands settled behind you, your fingers sinking into the grains. “Not always, but often enough, I suppose. It’s peaceful here.”  
He sat down beside you, his movements elegant. You could feel his eyes on your face but you didn’t look at him. Not yet. “It is that, I suppose.” 

Silence settled comfortably around you. The sound of the waves lapping at your feet and the bird in the air replaced whatever words you might have spoken. It was nice, to feel him sitting next to you like this. Shifting back further, you leaned on your elbows, relaxing as the sand cradled you comfortably. 

“Where have you been?”

“Missed me, my darling?”

You laughed. “Would it please you if I did?” He had this way about him that made you feel like he walked out of a Shakespeare festival. It was beginning to have an influence on how you spoke around him. Not that you minded it much. You looked over at him and watched him. 

“Perhaps it would.”

Turning, he regarded you. You smiled at him, closing your eyes for a moment before opening them again. He was now dressed in tan slacks and a light blue button down, the sleeves rolled passed his elbows. “Much better.” Smirking, you laid back in the sand, looking up at the clouds as they passed above you both. They were wispy and slow and peaceful. “That feels more appropriate for where we are.”

“You’ve done that before, my little one.”

You chuckled. “First of all, I’m not little, thank you very much. Secondly,” you continued, peeking an eye open to look at him. “Who comes to the beach in a black suit.”

“I didn’t choose the venue. You did.”

“So?” you asked with a wave of your hand. “You saw what it was and could have chosen your clothing accordingly. Plus, as you pointed out earlier, I’m often here. So you could have come prepared.” Sitting up, you turned to regard him, your full attention on the man. “Thirdly, I’m not yours.”

He smirked, looking rather pleased with himself as he watched you. “Where are we exactly?” he asked, ignoring your statement in a way that left you a little unsettled for the first time in his presence. 

“Easthampton. My parents used to bring me here when I was a little girl. We’d spent our summer vacations out here.”

“And do they still come here?”

It was sweet of him to ask about her family, as if he cared about her, about them. Your expression turned wistful and you turned and pointed. “They’re buried a few miles that way,” you said, indicating the location of the cemetery. “Sometimes, even though I know they’ve crossed over and they’re at peace, I can still feel them on this beach. So I don’t do there in the real world when I’m awake. Only in my dreams. And, in my dreams, I’m usually alone.”

“Do you wish me to go? I hadn’t meant to intrude on your solitude.”

You shook your head. “No, it’s alright. It just feels a little odd to have someone here with me. But not in a bad way.”

Nodding, he looked out over the water. “I lost my mother about a mont ago. I know it can be difficult to lose someone precious to you.”

Reaching over, you touched his arm. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

“It can be difficult and I was unable to say goodbye.”

“That can make it feel even worse.” Your gaze followed his back out to the water and you took a deep breath. The scent of the ocean, of fresh air and salt, filled your lungs and returned the feeling of serenity that this conversation was edging out. Once again, you both said nothing. Your hand remained on his arm as you watched the waves in front of you. 

When he spoke again, his voice was soft, gentle. “Would I be too bold if I asked what happened to your family?”

You sighed as you looked back over at him again. Lifting your shoulder in a shrug, you took a deep breath. “They were in a car accident. Coming out here, actually. I was going to take the bus and we were supposed to spend the weekend together. Just the three of us. Like we used to. I was home in my apartment, getting ready for the next day. I was packing my suitcase, trying to decide what I should bring, when I felt a presence behind me. I turned and my mother was standing there, leaning against the doorframe. She was in a long dress, the kind she always wore in the summertime. She looked so sad.” You stopped talking, remembering the moment vividly, a moment you would never forget. It was something you’d never spoken about to anyone before. To share it with this man felt natural. “That’s how I knew they were gone.” 

You had always been grateful for your family. While so many with abilities psychic or otherwise were ostracized by their families, your parents loved you dearly. They respected what you could do, did everything they could to help you learn to control and use your gift. They had never been frightened of you. For you, it made sense to bury them where you were all happiest. Both your parents hung back at the funeral, waiting for the other mourners to leave and for you to be alone so they could say a proper goodbye. You will always remember the way they faded into the misty rain that had been falling. At least they were at peace, in a better place. That helped her when she missed them.

“I am sorry for you loss. How long ago was it?”

“It will be four years next week.”

The silence settled around you once more and you didn’t look at him. The man reached out and took your hand in his. The gesture surprised you and you met his eyes. His fingers were chilled and you wondered why that way. The air around you was fairly warm and the sun hung high enough in the sky that the sand radiated heat as well. 

“Do you have any siblings? Any other family?”

You shook your head. “No, but it’s alright. I’ve gotten used to being alone and I have friends, ones who I can spend the holidays with and such.”

“And a love in your life?”

You laughed. “Not many men lining up to date a woman who talks to ghosts on the regular.”

“Well, then they are foolish. More so than I expected from mortal men.”

“Mortal men?” Your eyebrow arched as you regarded him. “Because you spirits are so much better now that you don’t have an expiration date?”

He chuckled. “Something along those lines. You are a truly remarkable woman. I am sorry that the men in your life don’t see that.”

“Somehow, I feel like you might be lying about that,” you quipped back. Still, the sentiment made you laugh and smile. It was the happiest you had felt on that beach in years, even if it was only a dream. Laying back in the sand, you looked up at the sky. After a moment, he joined you, your fingers intertwined. 

When you woke, you could have sworn he had been laying beside you. The sheets were ice cold and your fingers tingled as if they had been touched. You sat up slowly, running your fingers through your hair. That dream felt more real than any you had before. You weren’t entirely sure what to make of it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to mention timeline for this. This story takes place right after Thor: Dark World and as if Captain America: Civil War didn’t happen. Bucky joined the team and is struggling with his past. Thank you all so much for all the comments and kudos! You’re making me a very happy writer

“This is where you live?”

Bucky chuckled beside you. “Yeah. It’s not Brooklyn, but it’s home.” He put his hand protectively on the small of your back as he led you into the Avengers Tower. This was where it had all gone down. As soon as you were in the building, you could feel them. They were restless, spirits of the aliens that had invaded and the humans who had died because of it. It was a little overwhelming, to the point where you staggered for a moment, fingertips digging into your temples. 

“Hey, doll, you alright?”

You took several deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. It took more than a few before you could focus again. “Yeah.” Your voice was soft and you cleared your throat before repeating yourself. “Yeah, Buck. I’m fine. Sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry. Just want to make sure you’re okay.” 

Looking up, you saw the concern on his face. “I am. This place just has a lot of unrest. Took me a minute to adjust.” You flashed him a bright smile and gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. “Promise.”

“If you say so.” He didn’t look like he completely believed you but he thankfully let the subject drop. Taking you passed security, he brought you to the elevator and took you up to the residences. “Thor should be here soon. Steve’s trying to get him here so we can talk.” 

You raised an eyebrow. “Thor? As in God of Thunder, from Asgard Thor?”

“That’s him.” Bucky let you out to the terrace. “You want something to drink?”

“Water would be good. If that’s not too much trouble.”

He tossed you a grin. “Not at all. Be right back.”

Now alone, you walked to the railing and looked out over the city that you loved so much. There was a warm breeze that high up and it fluttered the skirt you’d worn around your legs. Turning your face to the sun, you smiled at its warmth. It reminded you of the dreams you’d been having and the mystery man who had been beside you. Multiple nights now, he’d been coming to you and you weren’t sad about it. He asked about you, about your life, but revealed very little about himself. You told him about your work days and about helping a new friend. It was a good feeling, having a friend like him. 

“Here you go.” Bucky had returned with a water bottle for you. “You look peaceful. More so than you did downstairs.”

“Being outside helps, I think. More fresh air helps keep my head clear. Let’s me focus on what I want to focus on and push out all the other noise.” You took a swig from the bottle. “Plus, I like being outdoors.”

“Then maybe you shouldn’t be living in the city.”

Shaking your head, you turned to him. “No, this city is my home. Even with everything that’s happened here. I could never leave New York.”

“I know that feeling. It feels good to be home.” 

You reached out and took his hand in yours. “While we’re waiting, how are you doing?”

He squeezed your fingers. “I’m alright, doll. Every day is hard but I get up, try to do good. Repeat daily.” Bucky let go and leaned against the railing beside you. “Some days are hard. When I wake up screaming because of the nightmares. Not something I share regularly.”

“Of course not.” Your arm brushed his as you mirrored his stance. “It won’t be something I share.”

“I know. Something about you makes me trust you.”

“I’ve been told that before. I have a good ear for listening. Suppose that’s one of the things that comes from listening to ghosts tell their tales when others couldn’t hear them.” 

Chuckling, he leaned against you for a moment. “I could see that.” 

“My mother always said I was a natural nurturer. Ghosts and spirits would always come up to me to share, to speak for them, and I would help them get to the other side once their business was done. Like a guide, I suppose.” She looked over at him and smiled. “Tend to be that way with people too. Debating being a bartender for a while because of that whole ‘therapist’ aspect to it, but...” You trailed off with a shrug. “Barista fits me better.”

“It does. Suits you. There is more warmth to it.”

You laughed. “If I didn’t know better, Bucky, I would say your flirting with me.” 

“Nah, doll. You’re beautiful, don’t get me wrong. But I’m not sure I should be looking for anyone right now.” His gaze moved to look back out over the city. You could see the sorrow in his expression and you looped your arm through his, tucking him close. “Gotta work on me.”

“You’ll find the right girl. She’s out there and maybe looking will help you get your house in order.” 

Turning, he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “You remind me of my sister. Miss her.”

“I bet you do.”

“Does she?”

“Hang around you?” You closed your eyes and focused, trying to see if you could feel her. There weren’t any spirits attached to him in that moment. “She isn’t now. If you want, we could see about looking for her some time.”

“If she’s at peace, I’d rather she stay at peace.”

“I understand, Bucky.” You leaned your head against his shoulder until thunder crackled above you. 

Turning, you both looked to the roof where a few years ago the Tesseract had been used to open up a wormhole for the Chitari. A rainbow came down and you looked at the man beside you. He grinned. “Looks like Thor’s arrived.”

“Certainly knows how to make an entrance.”

“That he does. Come on.” Bucky led you inside and up an elevator to a common area that seemed to be quite large. It was a party space, or so you thought. Seemed like a nice space. Steve and Thor were already waiting for you when walked into the room. Thankfully the Asgardian was wearing normal clothes and not the armor and cape he was seen in often. 

“Thor, I’d like you to meet Y/N. She’s here to help.”

“Lady Y/N, it is an honor to meet you,” the larger man said, striding across the room to pull your hand to his lips. “Though I am uncertain what you can do to assist me.”

You flashed him a smile. “I’m a medium. I speak with spirits and I understand you have lost family recently. Steve and Bucky thought that perhaps I could help you find some sense of closure.”

“Are you a witch then?”

Shaking your head, you tried to hide your laugh. “Not a witch. The term is psychic. But I do understand the confusion.” You gestured to the couches near the window. “Should we sit?” The four of you settled on the couches, Thor beside you and Bucky and Steve across of from you. “Maybe it will make more sense if I explain what I do and why I do it.”

“That would be most welcome.”

“When I was a child, I had an accident. It allowed me to commune with the dead. As I got older, I started to deliver messages from them, help them find their peace. It also happened that sharing messages from them helped their loved ones.” Your gaze remained on the god beside you. “I know that loss can be painful and not being able to say a proper goodbye can make it feel worse. The pain of it will linger and it will be hard on those left behind. From what they tell me, you lost your mother and your brother within a few days of one another.”

“They are correct. My mother died protecting the woman I cared for, as did my brother.”

“Noble. I would expect nothing less from your family.”

Thor gave you a tight smile. “Thank you. That is very kind, though you did not know my brother. I once tried to take over your city. I believe he was trying to make amends for that slight.”

That was not what you were expecting. “Wait, Loki is your brother?”

He nodded, his gaze wary now at your surprise. “He is.”

“Wow. I just...” For a moment, you paused, collecting your thoughts. “Do you want to communicate with both of them?”

“I have made my peace with my mother’s passing. She was a warrior queen who died protecting one who needed it. But Loki...” Thor looked out the window for a moment and you rested your hand on his arm. “Loki and I were not on the best of terms. But he was my brother and I loved him.”

“I understand. If you have something of his, it will help me channel his spirit.” Your tone was kind and compassionate. Though you weren’t sure if Loki would be a violent spirit or not based on what little you knew of his life, you knew that you could handle it. Thor needed the closure and you were happy to assist an Avenger. 

“I have many things but they are all on Asgard.”

You smiled. “I didn’t expect you to have something on you. Why don’t you get an object that he treasured or something that he gave you, and meet me at my apartment? I’ve got plenty of time for the rest of today and tomorrow if that would work.”

“That would be very kind, Lady Y/N.”

There was no helping the blush on your cheeks. “I’m no lady, Thor, but thanks for the sentiment.”

“Nonsense.” He brought your fingers to his lips again, brushing them against the back of your knuckles. “You are a very kind hearted and generous lady to offer to help me with this matter. I will never forget it.” Abruptly, he stood. “I must go but I will return shortly. Shall I meet you at your home?”

“Sure thing. I’ll make sure to leave my address with the boys here and get everything ready.”

“Until later then.” With a nod, he headed to the elevator, likely aiming for the roof.

“So... that’s Thor.”

You laughed at Bucky’s comment. “Yeah. Are gods always that charming?”

“Well, Thor is. Loki, not so much,” Steve said as he stood and brushed his hands off on his jeans. “He had a bit of a, well, a god complex. Wanted to rule the world. Thought he would make it better, but in a twisted kind of way.”

You shrugged. “Most people are misguided at some point in their lives. I imagine it’s not different with Asgardians.”

“You’ve really got a good heart there, doll,” Bucky said as he stood too. 

“Course I do. Someone has to these days.” You turned your attention to Steve. “I’ll give you my address. Bucky can come help me get ready.”

 

“So what all do you need?” 

You glanced over your shoulder at the super soldier. He was massive in your apartment and you hadn’t considered what it would look like to have him, Steve, and Thor all in your tiny one bedroom. “Not much. We can work at my kitchen table. Candles are nice.”

“No spirit boards?”

Your laughter rang out. “No, it’s not like that. While they can have their place, the spirit will talk to me and I will talk to you. Simple as that.” He looked to you for some kind of direction and you pointed to a cabinet. “In there are some thick white candles. Go ahead and take them out. Put them in the center of the kitchen table.”

You headed to the bedroom, knowing you had some sage on your dresser for cleansing. Since you hadn’t been sure when this would happen or where, you hadn’t bothered to cleanse your apartment. It would help you reach out to Loki. You also didn’t want any other spirits poking in while you were trying to talk to the Asgardian. Being that you’d never communed with a spirit from another world before, you weren’t sure what would work and what wouldn’t. 

“Sorry, hun. If you’re here, I’m gonna need you to clear out for a bit. Got a job to do and I don’t want you scaring off this Loki guy.” With that, you lit the bundle of herbs and started the ritual to give her apartment a clean slate. Spiritually speaking. 

“Whatcha doing?” 

Glancing over your shoulder, you smiled at Bucky. “Just getting ready, hun. I have a spirit that hangs around. Want to make sure he’s not around when Loki gets here. Might make him a little uncomfortable.”

“From what I’ve been told, I don’t think it would be a problem.” Bucky leaned against the doorway as you moved around the room. “He is a pretty tough cookie.” 

“Well, he is brother to a god.” The man moved out of your way as you went passed him and continued your ritual throughout the apartment, not missing a single corner. When you were done, you left the sage burning on a plate on the table. 

“And he did try to take over the world. From what I’ve been told.”

You lifted your shoulder in a shrug. “If he’s Thor’s brother, I’m sure he had a reason. I doubt anyone could be truly evil.”

“You’ve a little naive, doll. There is evil in the world.”

“I’m not saying there isn’t, Bucky, but Thor is good. And they were raised by the same parents. So there has to be good in there somewhere, right?”

It was his turn to shrug. “I don’t know. I never met the guy. Thor seems to be a fan, but then again, Loki has always been a weakness for him. He always saw the good in his brother and that lead to his downfall a couple of times.”

“Well, I suppose we’re going to find out soon enough, aren’t we?”

A loud crack of thunder echoed over the city and you turned to look out your window. You couldn’t see the tower from your apartment, but you smiled nonetheless. “Sooner rather than later it seems.”

You hadn’t expected Sam to come along with Steve and Thor. By the time they had arrived, the sage had been put out and the candles had been lit. You were ready for this and Bucky seemed keen to help you. Steve was a little dubious but otherwise prepared for whatever might happen. Sam on the other hand...

“Listen, Sam, if you’re going to be negative, you can wait outside.”

“What?” The man held up his hands in an attempt to look innocent. 

“You can’t be negative or the spirit won’t come. It’s going to be hard enough for me to get a spirit that isn’t from this city, who tried to take over the city, who died on another realm to come to my apartment to talk to his brother without negative energies.” You crossed your arms and gave him a look that made him sit down on the couch. 

“Sorry.”

With a nod, you went back to the kitchen table. Having the Avengers in your apartment had the exact effect you thought it would: the room was small. It was something you were going to have to ignore. The tension, however, was not something that you wanted to let linger. 

“I should explain how this will work. Thor, you will concentrate on your brother. Steve, Bucky, Sam, just think good thoughts. I don’t want anything to jeopardize this for Thor.” You were hoping that thinking of their friend over whatever fear or animosity there was towards Loki would help keep them on the right path. “With any luck, we’ll get him to come to us. But if he doesn’t, I wouldn’t want you to be discouraged, Thor.”

“I have encountered magic before, Lady Y/N. I understand it can be fickle.”

“As I said, it’s not magic, but I do understand where you’re coming from. Please,” you said, indicating the chair at the table. “Sit. What did you bring?”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pendant on a length of black lather cord. “This. Loki always had it with him. Before.”

You nodded, knowing what he meant. Thor hadn’t meant before he was killed. He meant before it all went to hell. Your fingers brushed against the metal as he held it out to you. It was a circle with a tree at its center, runes alone the edge. The leaves of the tree were set with green stones and you turned the silver pendant over. There was delicate filigree around the edges beyond the runes. On the back were two words, which you did not understand. 

“Loki and Frigga. Their names in our language.” Glancing up, you saw the expression on Thor’s face. “He was always beloved of our mother. Yggdrasil was a powerful symbol for my family, being that it held the Nine Realms together. My mother believed it would hold our family together as well. She knew of Loki’s true parentage and kept it secret, but they shared a love of magic.”

You closed his fingers over the necklace. “It’s perfect, Thor. Thank you.”

“Mother had one just like it. She wore it every day under her clothes. I made sure she was sent off to Valhalla with it.”

“I know they both appreciated that sentiment.” The men around you were quiet and the story had seemed to push the twinges of animosity aside from the others. Good. “Are you ready?”

“I am.”

You clasped Thor’s hands in your own, both your palms pressed to the pendant. “Think of Loki, of how he was before. A positive memory. A time when you were brothers, when you were both happy.” Thor closed his eyes and you could see him trying to come up with one. “It can be simple.”

“I have one.” 

“Good.” You closed your eyes and tried to pull on the emotions coming off the Asgardian. It wasn’t going to be easy but you were hopeful. Taking several deep breaths, you focused on Loki, on calling him to you. The flames flickered on the other side of your eyelids. Was he there already?

“Loki?” Thor called. “Loki, brother, is that you?”

For a moment, you thought it might be. It was fast, much faster than you had anticipated him coming to you. Wow. Before you could open your mouth and say something, you realized you knew all too well who was standing in your kitchen. “No. It’s not him.” 

With your eyes still closed, you turned to the corner where you could feel your friend. “Please. I need you to leave for a little while. I’m sorry about the sage but now is not the time.”

He didn’t leave. You could feel him growing stronger and you sighed. This was not the way it was supposed to go. “You cannot be here, my friend. We are trying to reach a spirit and I do not want to frighten him.”

Despite your request, the spirit grew stronger still. Finally, you opened your eyes and glared. “I swear to god if you—”

Your words were cut off when he materialized in front of you, wearing the dark suit he often wore in your dreams. From the gasps around the room, you knew the others could see him as well. 

“Brother?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Swearing. Anger. Fighting (verbal). Angst. So much angst for me. Mentions of torture (kind of)  
> Notes: Thanks for all the love. Had a crazy week but part four is ready for your reading pleasure! I don’t often do angst to this degree, so please let me know what you think!

“Brother?!”

“Forgive me, Y/N. I hadn’t meant to startle you.” His hands were up, as if to smooth a spooked beast. Taking two steps towards you, the man offered you a charming smile. One that might have actually worked had you not been doing the math.

The spirit who saved you was Loki. The man who tried to take over the world was the one who saved you. The spirit who had been visiting you for over two years was the God of Mischief. 

Holy shit.

“It is good to see you, brother,” Thor said as he stood and moved towards Loki. 

You stood as well, shaking as you did so. There were so many emotions going through your mind in that moment and you didn’t know which one to focus on first. Steve and Bucky moved to flank you and you could feel the energy in the room shift. Thor was thrilled, but the rest of you were more than a little wary. 

“Please, let me explain.”

“Explain how you’re not dead? That you’re not a ghost? That you have been haunting me since the Battle of New York? That you have been invading my privacy for over two years?!”

Try as you might, you couldn’t remain calm. The more you spoke, the closer the other men got to you, gathering protectively around you. Bucky touched you first, his hand going to your shoulder. 

Everyone could see the change in Loki’s expression at the sight of another man touching you. He clenched his hands but said nothing. 

“Brother, is this true? Have you been haunting Lady Y/N?”

“Haunting is not the right word. I have been visiting her. After I saved her in New York, I kept tabs on her, ensuring she was alright.” Though his words were directed at Thor, his eyes remained on you. “I never meant to invade her privacy but you have to understand my shock when she sensed my presence. I learned she spoke with the spirits of the departed and I allowed her to think of myself as one of them. It was comforting, when I could project myself from prison to see her.”

Prison?

“It was as comforting as my visits from Mother. I have been captivated by her, by you, my darling, and I am truly sorry to have deceived you for so long. Once I had begun, I knew not how to tell you the truth.” He bowed his head to you.

It was then you realized that everyone in the room was looking to you for some kind of reaction. As much as you were flattered, and honored that someone who wanted to enslave humanity chose to save you, anger won out. 

“You have got to be fucking with me?”

“I beg your pardon?”

You advanced on the god, fury radiating off you. “You lied to me for years. You tried to take over my planet.” You stabbed your finger into his chest and he took a step back. “You came into my dreams, and made me believe that you were some spirit, lost and in need fo guidance. You ruined whatever trust I had in you the minute you did that. Get out of my house.” Pointing to the door behind you, you growled, “Now!”

“Lady Y/N...”

“Not now, Thor. You all should leave,” you said, trying to quell your rage when you turned to face him, but it was back the moment you looked at Loki. “You especially.” Loki nodded, not fighting your anger as he took several steps towards your front door. 

“Wait, brother. I would have words with you.”

“Of course,” Loki sighed. 

Thor turned his attention back on you. “Thank you, good lady, for what you have done. I will ensure my brother never invades your home without your express permission again. Forgive me for his misdeeds.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Thor.”

He drew your fingers to his lips, kissing your knuckles. “May I call upon you tomorrow?”

“Have Bucky give me a call or something. I’ll meet you somewhere. I think I would rather like to avoid Asgardians in my home for a while.” 

“As you wish.” With a bow, he moved to stand near Loki. 

“You okay, doll?” Bucky asked as he put his hand back on your shoulder. 

It was much easier to focus on your friends rather than the infuriating god standing by your front door. “I’ll be okay. Think I need a drink though.”

“You want one of us to stay with you?” Sam asked. 

You shook your head. “Honestly, I think I just need to process this on my own. Having you all here is just a reminder of what has been happening and I need to think. Thanks for the offer though.”

Steve wrapped you up in a hug. “Let us know if you change your mind. We can be here nice and fast if you need us.”

“Thanks, Steve.” You gave the other two hugs as well before showing them out. Your eyes didn’t meet Loki’s but you could feel them on your skin as you closed and locked the door. Logically, you knew that there was nothing that could keep the god from your home but you also knew that he seemed to care for you. You hoped that would mean he would respect your wishes. Time would tell.

 

“How dare you!”

Loki wasn’t sure who he expected to yell at him first but Bucky was not it. He’d never even met the man before but there he was, furious at the god. The trip back to the tower had been tense. Steve had driven himself, Sam, and Thor to your apartment for the attempted communication with Loki, so they had all piled into the SUV for the ride back. That had been tense. 

“I beg your pardon?”

Bucky advanced on the man. “How dare you do that to her! She is a kind person, one who just wanted to help your brother but you had been lurking around her for years?! I get you’re not from around here but that’s unacceptable. You do not go hiding in someone woman’s apartment pretending to be a ghost so she lets you stay. Did you enjoy watching her dress? Or seeing her with other men?”

“There were no other men.”

A metal fist connected with Loki’s jaw. “Wrong answer, pal.”

Before he could do anything else, Thor pulled the super soldier back. While he didn’t make a comment, anyone could see he was pissed. He turned and pointed at Loki. “You have gone too far, brother.”

Loki rubbed at his jaw, more than a little impressed at the power the mortal man possessed. “I have done nothing untoward towards the lady, I can assure you.” When Sam looked like he might protest, the God of Mischief sighed. “I never observed her in a state of undress. Never lingered should she need some private time. I never observed her while she bathed. Should I have arrived during such a time, I either averted my gaze or left. Whichever the situation warranted.”

“Oh, and we’re just supposed to believe you?” Sam countered, crossing his arms. 

“While I understand that I have not earned anyone’s trust, and have lost the faith in which Y/N had placed in me, I speak the truth.”

“So why save her?” It was the first time Steve had spoken since they left your apartment. He’d leaned against the wall, watching. He knew Bucky was protective of you, had been since you’d all met. He also knew there wasn’t anything romantic in his friend’s feelings towards you either. You reminded him of his sister and that was doing Bucky a lot of good. But Loki had messed with the wrong woman. “Why go out of your way to protect someone that you despised not all that long ago?”

“I could never despise Y/N. She is far too precious for such an emotion.” At the word ‘precious’, the other men in the room tensed. “I saw her that day, when I was so hellbent on acquiring myself a throne. She was beautiful, innocent. The last thing I wanted was to see her dead or enslaved.” Loki met the gaze of each of them in turn. He could see they still suspected him to be a villain. Whatever good graces he might have gotten saving Thor was dissipating rapidly. “It may surprise you to learn that my actions then were not entirely my own. The Other, and his cruel master, had been manipulating me, reminding me that they could torture me for the rest of time should I fail to procure for them the Tesseract. You don’t know what new sorts of Hell they had imagined for me. Any time I was slow in my progress, I would get a taste.” It still lingered for him and he’d never intended on telling another soul about what happened. It made him weak, but he realized he needed to gain their trust in him. “It is something I should never like to think about again.

“But I saw her, standing there with one of those computer things in her arms and I had never seen a woman so stunning in all my life, in all my travels.” He made to move away from the wall he’d been backed towards and they let him pass to move to the bar. Loki poured himself a drink and sipped it for a moment. “The idea of her being crushed beneath rubble, and more over because of something of my doing, was not something I could live with. So I interceded. I pushed her beneath a table and protected her. Perhaps that weakness was something that led to my capture.”

“I think Hulk throwing you able like a rag doll and smashing you into the floor had more to do with it,” Sam muttered, crossing his arms. 

Loki steeled himself for a moment. Getting angry at these men was not wise. They were your friends and moreover, he needed to prove to them that he was no threat. That he truly felt for you. “Regardless of what happened to make me stop, I was stopped. In prison, Frigga showed me that I could project out of my cell by projecting in. I must admit that I was curious. I wanted to know what had become of the woman I rescued. I came to her and she could sense me. I thought there had to have been some mistake. I was cloaked, shrouded in such a way that none should have been able to know I was there. But she did.”

He shook his head, smile on his lips. “She spoke to me and admit that I wanted to know more about her. So whenever I could, I would visit. She would speak to me, often yell at me for not speaking back, but she would speak to me, tell me of her day, of the people she helped. I knew she had power but I hadn’t realized how much. After attempting to help you, brother, when you thought me dead, I came here. I visited her and, unbound by my cell, I was able to enter her dreams. It happened by accident the first time. There, we spoke and I found her to be intelligent and gracious.”

“So not only did you intrude on her life but you also meddled in her dreams?”

“Thor, it isn’t like that. I merely spoke with her, sat beside her as she told me of her family, of her life.” He remembered how she had managed to change his garb in her dreams. She had a power she didn’t know she possessed. It was impressive for a mortal woman, but he thought of her as more than that now. 

Silence settled over the room and Loki looked up. Thor was eying him and he looked at his brother, meeting his gaze and almost daring him to say something, anything, to call him out. Never before had the God of Mischief felt this way about anyone. While there had been women in his past, they had not had made the same impact on him. You made him want to be his better self, the self he was when he helped Thor escape Asgard, when he saved his brother from Kurse and the Dark Elves on that barren wasteland. He wasn’t about to let his brother and his friends ruin that for him. 

It seemed Thor could sense this change. For that, Loki was grateful. “I will speak with her tomorrow. I wish to gaze her reaction to your true self and see what kind of damage you may have caused.”

“I caused no damage, I assure you. My intentions with her have ever been pure.” He finished the last of the amber liquid he’d poured, wishing it were stronger. “I’m afraid that once I had come to her under the guise of a spirit, it was hard to find a time to reveal the truth to her.”

Striding forward, Thor clapped his brother on the shoulder. “I shall see if it can be mended.”

“That’s it? You’re just going to take his word and talk to Y/N for him?” Bucky was incensed. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am, Sargent. My brother may be many things, may even be the villain you know him to be, but he has a good heart. Our mother loved him for a reason, trusted him for a reason. I wish to honor that trust as I should have long ago.” He focused back on Loki. “But never forget that should you betray that trust, it will never be given again.”

“I assure you I will not. It would keep me from Y/N, and I have enough reparations to make for deceiving her.”

“You’re damn right about that,” Bucky muttered. 

 

For the first time in weeks, you dreamed without any interruptions. There were no interlopers on your beach. It was peaceful but when you woke, you felt anything but rested. Sighing, you rolled over and curled around your pillow. How had your world become this? Gods? Avengers? It seemed like some weird dream and that made you laugh before you buried your face in the pillow beneath you. What you wouldn’t give to talk to your mother.

Despite the fact that it was your day off, you showered and dressed, heading to the cafe. A change of scenery would do you some good, or so you believed. Nico was surprised to see you but didn’t comment on it until he made you your latte and bagel. The older man wiped his hands before pushing the plate across the high counter towards you. There was worry in his expression and you didn’t want him to fret over you. This was something you could handle. Couldn’t you?

“What’s bugging you?”

“A spirit,” you said, unsure how to explain the whole situation. “A spirit lied to me and I really don’t know what to thing or say.”

“How did it lie?”

Sighing, you leaned against the counter. “Well, for starters, not actually dead. Actually a god.”

Nico’s eyes grew round. “A god?

You nodded and sipped at the latte. “Mmhmm. From Asgard.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah.” With another sigh, you moved your plate and mug to one of the stools and made yourself comfortable. “I’m still trying to figure out if I’m more pissed or more hurt by the whole thing.”

“This is the one who saved your life?”

Nodding again, you picked at your food. “Yep.”

Nico knew the story. You’d told him one night when you were closing up, when you needed someone who would believe you as you said some impossible things. It had been comforting then, to have someone know the truth. Now, you were so conflicted. It was hard to decide how to feel. 

“I could see both. He’s been around a long time.”

“Yeah. He has.” Your phone went off and you looked at the screen to see Bucky’s name flashing on it. “Hey, Buck.”

“Hey, doll. Listen, Thor is wondering if you could talk to him today.” 

It was a call you knew was coming. You had no idea what you wanted to say to the Asgardian. There was a lot swirling around in your head and you knew that you logically couldn’t avoid him forever. Either of them.

“I will come alone.”

Ah, well, that would make it easier. “Sure. Why don’t we meet at Battery Park in an hour?”

“I shall ask Captain Rogers how to get here.”

“Sounds good. I’ll see you then.” With a sigh, you hung up and put the device next to your plate. This was going to be a long day.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Angst  
> Notes: Oh man, I loved your reactions to part four. Really, it was giving me life. I hope this gives you some kind of idea of how things are going. Feedback is love.

Battery Park was busy and yet it was one of your favorite places. You could see the water, the Statue of Liberty. It was a great place to people watch and you settled yourself on a bench with your second cup of coffee for the day. Thor knew what you looked like and you had a feeling he wouldn’t be alone. The real question was going to be if Loki would be with his brother. 

You still hadn’t decided how you felt about the man. He’d been the one to save your life and you were grateful for that, but at the same time you felt as if your trust had been betrayed. He took advantage of the fact that you were a medium. 

Did he deserve to tell you his side of the story?

Probably. But that didn’t mean you wanted to hear it today.

Sighing, you swirled your cup, mixing the drink again before taking a final sip. You threw it out in the trash can next to the bench before settling back in. This would have been a good place to take a book but you hadn’t planned on coming here today.

“Lady Y/N!”

Turning, you had a smile on your face as Thor and Steve approached you. Behind them, Loki and Bucky hung back. Bucky didn’t look pleased at all. You were curious what had been said amongst the men but decided to focus on Thor first. 

“Hey, big guy.” You held your arms out for a hug and he wrapped you up, giving you a firm squeeze. “Oh, good hugger.”

“Thank you,” he said, a little confused but you ignored it in favor of hugging Steve. 

“Thought you were coming alone.”

“I couldn’t keep Loki away from you and Bucky wasn’t going to let him be alone with you and I figured I would mediate.” Steve ruffled your hair and you shook your head. 

“You and Bucky are impossible, you know that?”

He laughed. “We’ve been told that before. For years.”

“I believe it.” They were overgrown children sometimes. You turned your attention the god beside you. That was still an odd thought to have, to know that gods and super soldiers were part of your life now. 

“I am grateful you would meet with us. I know you saw my brother but I wanted to speak with you first. He is hopeful you will allow him to explain himself.”

“I’ll listen to you, Thor, and then let you know. I don’t know how I feel about him right now.”

“That’s understandable, doll,” Steve said. “I think it’s worth listening to him but you have to make that decision for yourself.” 

That was unexpected. Of all the people in the world, she hadn’t anticipated Steve being the one who was speaking for Loki. “Alright. Can we walk though? I have all this nervous energy and it would be better to move.”

Steve chuckled. “Sure thing. Come on.” He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, leading you away from Bucky and Loki along the railing at the water’s edge. Once you were a ways away from the others, he let his arm drop. 

“My brother has never been what you would call a saint,” Thor began, earning a snort of laughter from the super solider beside you. “My mother long believed his heart to contain good, but he was often overshadowed by me. For my part, I wish I could have made things different, but it is not something that can be changed. Though he has done much to warrant any mistrust, I believe his intentions with you were the most pure he’s had in all my memory.”

“I really don’t know how it’s possible to invade my home with aliens and then creep in my apartment for two whole years and still have “pure” intentions,” you replied, curling your fingers in the air when you said pure. 

“That is something I can understand, m’lady. His actions were not the best, but his heart was in the right place. I believe that is your saying.” At your nod, he continued. “My brother was quite taken with you when he encountered you on his first trip to New York. Seeing you, I can understand why. The more I have seen of what you can do just confirms that for me. He has never been like this with a woman before, not even on Asgard and I assure you he was quite popular among the ladies of court.” 

Though there was a faint flush on your cheeks from hearing this, you were trying to stay tough. “I really fail to see how telling me he was a ladies man makes him hiding in my apartment as a ghost any better. It just makes it worse, actually, that he was watching me while I was home alone. Did he watch me sleep? Was that how he got into my dreams?”

“I cannot answer those questions for you. Only Loki can. And I fully understand how he has broken your trust. All I ask is that you speak with him. Sargent Barnes has offered to be with you when you speak with him so you will not be alone. If you wish.”

“I think I’ll be okay, but let’s be honest. I’m not going to go very far with him.” You ran a hand through you hair before letting out a deep sigh. “I suppose it’s now or never at this point.” Turning, you led the others back to Loki and Bucky. On the way, Thor and Steve got stopped a few times for photos. Both of them were gracious and you happily took the pictures for them. It was something that distracted you from what you were going to have to talk about. 

“Hey, doll!” 

“Hey, Buck!” you said, waving at him. 

Loki stood slowly from the bench beside him as Bucky came over and wrapped you up in a tight hug. You couldn’t help but laugh as he spun you around. Part of you knew he was just trying to get a rise out of Loki, but you didn’t fight it. For now, you were reminded what it would have been like to have a brother and it felt good. 

“Put me down, ya big doofus.” Swatting his arm, you shook your heard. “You’re terrible,” you whispered. 

“Nah. But if I was, you love it.”

Shaking your head, you moved passed him to Loki. “You guys wanna give us some space?” you called, not bothering to look at the men beside you. “I’ll be fine.”

“Not you I’m worried about,” Steve muttered. It made you smile. Even after so short a time, he and Bucky knew you well. 

“Can we sit?” Loki asked, indicating the bench he’d just risen from. 

“Sure.” You sat and crossed your legs, twisting your body so you were facing him. “Thor says you wanted to talk, so talk. I’ll listen.”

“I’m hardly sure where to begin.” 

He looked at his hands as he joined you and you could sense his unease. It was coming off him and part of you wanted to reach out, to rest your hand on his arm and tell him it would be alright. But you couldn’t. You didn’t know if it was going to be alright. He had lied to do and betrayed you for years. 

“Beginning is usually the best place.”

“The beginning is a very long starting point. Perhaps if I give you an abridged version until I met you.” He looked up at you and you had to school your features, not show how much you wanted to react to the pain in his blue-green eyes. “For my life, I believed that I was destined for a crown. I was the son of Odin, meant to be on a throne. But it wasn’t entirely true. I was the child of the king of Frost Giants. I was abandoned and when I found that out, I was enraged. I thought I was a monster. Perhaps I still am.

“I had already put a plan in motion to seize the throne from my brother, from the shirtless oaf I believed him to be. So I saw it through and I failed. I fell from the Bifrost and was found by The Other. His master wanted the Tesseract. He wants the Infinity Stones and I was to help him. If I did that, then I could have Earth. I could fashion myself a throne, a kingdom. A place where people would worship me. Yes, there were threats. The Other got inside my head, making me feel pain, the things that they would do to me if I failed them. I had to finish the job so that I would no longer be at their mercy. I was a fool then.”

He reached for your hand and you let him. His fingers were cold and now you knew why. He was a Front Giant. You wondered what that looked like. “And then I saw you. You were beautiful. I had never seen another like you. And despite what they had done to me, how they had manipulated me, how they tortured me, I didn’t want to hurt you. I couldn’t hurt you.”

“So you saved me?”

“I did. I couldn’t let you die. It cost me everything I wanted, though if you ask my brother and his companions, they would say their rather large green friend did that.” You couldn’t help your soft laugh at that comment. His eyes weren’t quite so sad when you did that and you gave his hand a squeeze. “When I was imprisoned, I thought that I would never see you again. That thought gave me great sadness. My mother, Frigga, wouldn’t let me be alone. She visited me, but she came as a vision, an illusion. It might not have been her intent, but she showed me that I could see you if I wanted.”

“And I thought that you were a ghost.”

“Imagine my surprise when this beautiful creature called out to me, when she knew I was there.” He laughed, shaking his head. “I did not want to frighten you but hearing you speak to me, I did something I never expected. I hid. I watched you, listened to you when you needed me. I know that I betrayed your trust in doing so, and I would beg your forgiveness. I could not stay away. Once I was freed from prison, I came to you with all my power but you were asleep. I smoothed back your hair and suddenly I was in your dreams. I never watched you when you were indecent. I never wanted to to cause you pain or anger, and for that you have my deepest and most sincere apology.”

So that was it. As far as apologies go, it was a pretty good one. “It’s a lot, Loki.” 

“I know.” 

“I’m going to need time. To process it.” You huffed out a breath and looked around you, to the people passing you by. All these people were alive because the god beside you thought you were beautiful. That was a weighty thought, one you really did need time to process. It was unexpected but none of your life had been what you thought it would be. Maybe that was a good thing. Maybe it wasn’t. Right now, you needed to do something for yourself. 

“I shall leave you alone then, shall I?”

Your gaze returned to Loki. “Just give me some time, please. I’ll figure it out, what it means for me. What it means to me.” Since you hadn’t let go of his hand, you gave it a gentle squeeze. “I know you care for me and I have grown to care for you as well. That hasn’t changed because of all this. Part of me wishes it did, that I could let the sting of being betrayed win out. But I can’t.”

The hopeful look on his face made you smile at him. “I need time. Normal people need time. You were trying to do the right thing in your own way and I can understand that. But I need to figure out how I feel about all of this. If I can deal with all of it and who you are and—”

“And what I have done.”

“Yes.” 

He was quiet a moment before he pulled your joined hands to his lips. But still he said nothing. Together, you simply sat on the bench, together, watching the people go by. It felt good to sit beside him, as if you were two normal people. Neither of you were and you knew you couldn’t stay that way without working through what happened. But for now, for this moment, you were happy to stay there with him. You shifted closer and laid your head on his shoulder. For now, you could just be. The thinking would come later when you were alone, when you processed what your life had become and if you could really find a place for a god in it.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: A bit of angst and a decision  
> Notes: This chapter contains a nod to one of my favorite moments in Thor: Ragnarok: Get Help. It isn’t really a spoiler since the clip was released online, but I figured I would warn y’all just in case.

It felt nearly impossible for him to remain calm, to not spend time with you when he wanted to do so. But he also wanted to respect your wishes. When Bucky had returned to the bench, you had stood and Loki liked to think it was somewhat reluctantly. The soldier wanted to take you home but you insisted you could walk yourself. You promised to call soon, though he had no phone. He supposed someone at the Tower would tell him. Or so he hoped.

Standing on the balcony, letting the wind push through his hair, he let himself think of you. Yes, he could have used his power to see you, to ensure you were alright. But he made a promise. He was going to keep it. Try as he might. It wasn’t in his nature to keep promises, not completely. That was part of being a trickster. He was made for mischief. Loki knew that. The thing about it was that you made him want to keep them. 

“Brother.”

Turning, he watched Thor approach him. He seemed well suited to Midgardian clothing. “Good evening. Would have thought you would have gone home by now.”

“I could say the same about you. Father was concerned to learn of your survival.”

“Concerned. Of course.” Scoffing, Loki turned back to the city below him. It made sense that Odin would worry about him still being alive since he was broken out of prison. “Has he called for my return to the cells below the palace?”

“No, brother. No, Father is concerned that you have been hiding from this woman.”

“You told him about her?” Loki whirled on his brother, ready to defend you. He hadn’t wanted to share you with the man who claimed to be his father. He feared that Odin would use you against him. 

“No great details. Simply that a mortal woman with a good heart was why you were here on Midgard.” Thor leaned against the railing, mirroring Loki’s position from earlier. “I think he believes she might be good for you.”

“If she can forgive me.” Changing the subject to you wouldn’t completely distract him. Loki would pay attention, come with some way to keep you safe from his adopted father. “I fear I may have betrayed the wrong person.”

Thor chuckled. “It is funny to hear you say that after the number of times you betrayed me.”

He said nothing. Thor had a point. Loki had been betraying him for a long time. Perhaps it was time to acknowledge that. He was the villain after all. Did a villain, a monster, deserve to be loved? Deserved to have someone to love? He didn’t think so. It made him want to leave you behind, to return to Asgard. And yet he couldn’t bring himself to leave. He supposed that made him even more of a villain, that he couldn’t leave the beautiful damsel.

What kind of man had he become?

“You know, I thought the world of you. When we were younger, I always wanted to fight with you, side by side. I wish you had seen that then, that you understand that was all I wanted. I didn’t want to compete for the throne with you. I wanted to be your brother above all.”

Loki turned, his surprise evident on his face. For a moment, he said nothing. What could he say to his brother in that moment? He was not the type for the sincere familial moments, but this felt like that. 

“I suppose it doesn’t matter any longer. You would prefer it if we never saw each other again, I’m certain.”

“I am not the person you grew up with, Thor. I have not been him for a long time.”

“But you could be again. If you wanted to be.” Thor turned and regarded Loki.

“I’m not sure it is possible.”

“If I have learned anything over the last several years it’s that for love, anything is possible.” Loki looked away at his brother’s words, unsure if he wanted to be that man again. If he really could. Thor clapped him on the back. “The Lady Y/N is noble and kind. I think that she will forgive you. I know I have.” With that, he left the God of Mischief alone with his thoughts.

 

It took you three days before you were ready to talk to him. For those three days, you didn’t dream. Hell, you didn’t sleep much either. Loki had been consuming your thoughts. It wasn’t something you really wanted to admit, but he had. He distracted you at work. Thoughts of him came unbidden in the shower, while you were cooking, when you attempted to rest. He had been a constant in your life for two years. You owed him your life. 

“Hey, you in there, honey?” 

Turning, you looked over your shoulder to see Nico. He appeared concerned for you and you nodded. “Yeah. Just been a little out of sorts lately.”

“Well, gods walk among us, so I can see that being a hard thing to wrap your brain around.” He stood beside you and took the rag from your hand. “And that spot is the cleanest it’s been since I opened this place.”

You laughed, turning to lean back against the counter. “Yeah. I mean, having Avengers as friends was weird enough but a god in love with me? Beyond strange.”

“Darlin’, you speak to ghosts. Strange went out the window a long time ago with me.” He turned and went to the espresso machine, starting to fix you a drink. “I’ve accepted it. I know you have too. But maybe, just maybe, this was what you were meant to be doing. Who knows what can of help you can provide them.” 

Once you had a latte in hand, you took a long, deep sip. It warmed your chest and you closed your eyes. The caffeine was welcome at this point. “You really think I can be helpful to them? To actual heroes?”

“I think you’ve been a hero to a lot of people, dear. You’ve helped so many over the years. Surely you know that.”

“Well, yeah but hero? That doesn’t feel like me.”

“But it is.” Nico put his hand on your shoulder. “You’re a hero to me. Look at the peace you gave me when I lost my wife. Look at how you’ve helped me heal, to move on and find love again. You have done more than you thought. I hope one day you can see that.”

“And what do you think I should do about the whole Loki situation?”

He chuckled. “I can’t tell you what to do with your own love life, hun.” Leaning in, he kissed your forehead. “But I’ll support you when you make your choice. Why don’t you take a break? Sit for a few and enjoy that coffee. See if it helps you make up your mind.”

“Thanks, Nico.” 

As much as you missed your own father, Nico had been a good surrogate. Sure, he needed to be cared for, but he also took care of you. He provided a flexible job for you, a person to confide in. He was good people. You sat in the corner of the cafe and sipped at your drink. 

Eventually, you lost yourself in your thoughts, considering what Loki had told you. You believed him. That wasn’t the problem. Could you let go of him spying on you for years? You really thought you could. For him, you could. Someone ordered a drink and the lilt of his voice sounded familiar. When you glanced up, you were disappointed to see it wasn’t Loki. That should have told you everything. 

“Hey, Nico?”

“Gonna head out?”

“I made a decision.”

He grinned. “Then, by all means, go. I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

You ran to the back and grabbed you bag before heading outside to hail a cab. Usually, you preferred the subway, but you needed to get to the Tower and fast. Yes, you told him you would call but you didn’t want to waste time. Unlike usual, there was a cab ready for you and you hoped in. It didn’t take long to reach your destination. 

You stared out the window, watching your beloved city roll by. Nothing about how you felt was easy. You knew that people would have a hard time accepting him. But you didn’t. You knew that Loki had a good heart, one he let few people into. You were one of them so you had to hold onto that. The question was what would you say to him, how would you tell him how you felt when you could barely put the feelings into words yourself. 

They let you into the lobby, having been added to the approved guest list a while ago. You headed upstairs and burst into the common room, startling Sam and Bucky. “Where is he?”

“The balcony. He’s been out there for days.”

You dropped your purse and ran passed them both. In doing so, you missed Bucky handing Sam ten bucks. Pushing open both glass doors, you skidded to a stop. Loki was standing there, in the black suit, minus the jacket. The sleeves were rolled up, the way you cad done to him in your dreams. He looked so handsome. 

You smiled as you walked towards him. What you were going to say, you didn’t know. It didn’t matter. You would figure it out. He heard you, turning with surprise on his face. “Y/N? What are you doing here?”

“I came for you.” Cupping his cheek, you pulled his mouth down to yours. It took a half a moment, barely a blink before he slid a hand into your hair, the other settling on the small of your back as he pulled you against him. This was what you had been waiting for, the thing you denied yourself because you believed him to be a spirit. 

You had fallen for him. 

His mouth slanted over yours and he let it build slowly. You ciched against his mouth and Loki took his opening. He slid his tongue along your lower lip and you welcomed it. Your free hand clutched at his shirt, bringing your body as close as it could get to his. Hearing Loki groan against you was intoxicating. Eventually, you needed air and when you broke the kiss, you didn’t stray far from his lips. 

“Does this mean I am forgiven?”

Laughing, you slid your hand into his hair. “Yes, but don’t lie to me again. I won’t be as understanding.” 

“Never, my love.” This time, he kissed you even more slowly. He nipped at your lower lip, slowly pulling it between his. Than hand at the small of your back slid beneath your shirt, stroking the strip of skin at your lower back. You clutched him, clinging to his body as he woke a fire within you. Each caress of his fingers, each pull of his lips had you melting against him. It made you sigh, moan, feel as if every nerve in your body was alive and firing. 

“Wow,” you breathed when he pulled back a second time. 

“That was nothing, darling. I can take you to Valhalla if you let me.” The grin on his face was positively devious. No wonder he was the God of Mischief. It made you feel weak in the knees, in a way you thought only happened in movies or books.   
You grinned back at him. “Perhaps I will. But you have to buy me dinner first.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: None  
> Notes: This is a little filler chapter, but I hope you like it. My plan is to put up part eight on Christmas Eve.

“I don’t like this.” Bucky crossed his arms, managing to look bigger than he already was despite his posture. “I don’t like this one bit.’

Beside him, Sam had a giant grin on his face. “He’s just mad cause I bet him that you would forgive the horned wonder over there and he said I was crazy.”

Loki bristled at your side at the nickname but said nothing. 

“It’s not just the bet!” Bucky eyed the god. “He’s dangerous.”

“You’re all dangerous in one way or another, Buck,” you offered. “But it’s how you behave, what you do with your abilities.”

“Look at what he did last time he was on Earth! How many people lost their lives!”

Taking a deep breath, you pulled away from Loki. You gave his hand what you hoped was a reassuring squeeze before moving to stand in front of the man who had quickly become like family to you. Putting your hands on his arms, you looked into his eyes. “Bucky, I know you don’t understand why I feel the way I do, why I have forgiven him, but I hope you will eventually. People deserve second chances, especially if they’re willing to make their wrongs right.”

“And I fully intend to do so,” Loki offered, though his tone was a little tight. You could understand. He loved you and you had these other men in your life, ones who were special to you in their own way. But it didn’t help, particularly to one such as Loki.

“Give him a chance. For me?”

Bucky sighed and you could see him deflate a little. He wrapped you up in a big bear hug. “If he hurts you, can I kill him?”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “You’ll have to get in line. If he hurts me, I get first dibs.”

“Deal.”

Loki cleared his throat. “Do I get any say in this?”

Pulling away from Bucky, you glanced behind you. “In the order of your ass kicking should you dare to hurt me again? Sure. You want Thor to go before Bucky or after?” you teased. “Not that it matters since you won’t do that.” You trusted him. He needed to know he had your trust in that way, that you believed him when he told you what happened, why he had done the things he’d done. 

“Lady Y/N!” Everyone turned as Thor came into the room. “I thought I heard you and then you spoke my name. What will I be doing?”

“Nothing, big guy. I was just teasing your brother.” You returned to Loki’s side as Thor let out a laugh.

“A favored pastime of myself and my companions. Tell me, are we continuing? I have more than a few tales to tell of his past actions.”

Loki grumbled something inaudible next to you and you leaned in to kiss his cheek. “No, I think we’re done for now,” you replied. “I’ll be sure to let you know if it changes.”

“Don’t you dare, woman,” Loki growled in your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. It wasn’t one of fear, but you did want to find out what sweet tortures he’d have in store should you defy him in that way. 

Your fingers curled in his shirt, keeping him close to you as you looked at him. “And if I did?” you murmured.

Mischief danced in his eyes and you remembered what it was like on the beach in your dreams, when it was just the two of you and your life wasn’t quite so complicated. “One day, I will show you, my love, and you will regret teasing a god.”

“Promises, promises.” 

You were smiling and laughing and that seemed to easy Becky’s mind somewhat. It didn’t mean that he was going to forgive Loki as quickly as you had. You had, however, made a good point. Everyone deserved a second chance so he would give that to him. For you. It wasn’t that long ago that he had been hoping for a second chance of his own so he understood that feeling. For now, Bucky would keep his eye on you both and ensure you were taken care of by Loki. 

The way Loki looked at you should have been enough to calm anyone’s concerns. He was so happy that you had forgiven him that even the ribbing that was coming from your friends couldn’t dampen his mood. 

“What are you all doing in here?” The voice came from the doorway and you turned to see Tony Stark standing there. You had yet to meet him and you were a little star struck. Not that you were showing it. Loki came up behind you and slid an arm around you once more and you noted that he was a little protective in that movement. “Reindeer games.”

You giggled a little but quieted when Loki squeezed your waist. “What did I say about teasing a god, love?” he murmured in your ear. 

“And what did I say about promises?” you replied. 

“And who might you be?” Tony asked, taking your hand in his.

“I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you, Mr. Stark.”

“Tony, please. It’s nice to finally meet the person Bucky, Steve, and Sam won’t shut up about.” He grinned at you as he kissed your knuckles. Seemed everyone was trying to mess with Loki. It was a little thing, but you could understand why. “What are you doing with Loki?”

“I’ve actually known Loki for quite a while,” you offered. Taking your hand back, you wrapped it around Loki. “And I’ve forgiven him for our past so we’re going to move forward with our future.”

Tony did a double take. “Wait. You’re dating him?”

“I suppose you could say that.” Loki dropped a kiss to the top of your head and you smiled even brighter. “So I guess you’ll be seeing a lot of me.”

“I guess so. Don’t suppose I could talk you into being our personal barista. Bucky raves about your lattes.”

Laughing, you shook your head. “No. Sorry, Tony. I like where I woke. But I’m happy to whip some up when I visit.”

“I won’t object,” Sam called, making everyone laugh. Even Loki. There was hope for the others to forgive him too.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: None really. Mostly fluff. A little teasing.  
> Notes: Happy Christmas Eve to those who celebrate! I’m sick but enjoying a relaxing day at home with my hubby so I hope you are enjoying whatever things you like to do this time of year.

“You’re seriously going to go on a date with him?”

“Yes, Bucky, I am,” you said for what felt like the billionth time. He still didn’t understand how you had forgiven Loki for spying on you. At this point, you weren’t sure he ever would understand. It wasn’t like it was easy to explain why you chose of a god, one who had attempted to enslave the world for himself, but you had. You loved him, cared deeply for him. His actions had been misguided but also you knew they were not entirely his own. For that, he would have to make amends but that wasn’t what this night was about.

Bucky had come over to spend time with you while you got ready. It was nice to have someone there while you picked out a nice dress and did your hair. You were putting on make up and you glanced at him in the mirror. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like you’re going on a date with a super villain?”

Rolling your eyes, you put down the mascara. “Look, Buck, you know that not everyone who was considered a villain actually is. Give him a chance. That’s all I ask.”

He sighed. “If he betrays you again, can I kill him?” Bucky seemed surprised when a pillow hit him in the face. “What? You’re like a sister to me now and I would say the same thing about any man.”

A knock at your door had both your heads turning. “Be nice.”

“I’m always nice,” he grumbled as he swung his legs over the edge of your bed and stood up. 

You smacked his flesh arm as you made your way to the door. Loki stood on the other side, wearing a suit but not the all black one you had grown accustomed to seeing him. He looked striking in charcoal grey with a crisp white shirt and a dark green tie. His hair was slicked back and he held out a bouquet of flowers. 

“I was told this was customary on a first date.”

There was no helping the smile that crossed you lips as you let him inside. He seemed a bit surprised to see Bucky in your apartment. “I was just leaving. Let me know if you need anything.”

“I’ll be fine, you overprotective crazy person.” You used both hands to shove him out the door. “Good night, Barnes.”

“Night, doll.” 

The door clicked closed after him and you turned back to your date for the evening. “Sorry about that. He’s been a little protective since we met. Apparently, I remind him of his sister a bit so he’d kind of adopted me.”

“It’s quite alright. I understand that can be a good thing.” He held out the flowers. “These won’t be needing any water. They’re from Asgard. My mother’s garden to be exact. She would have loved that I found you.”

‘They’re beautiful, really. Thank you, Loki.” Setting the flowers on the table, you crouched down to pull your favorite vase from under the sink. You could arrange the flowers more later, but you wanted to display them before you left for your date. Glancing over your shoulder, you saw Loki standing in your kitchen as if he belonged there. It felt so familiar to have him there with you, as if he always belonged in your home. That probably had to do with the fact that his presence, while not physical, had been a fixture there for the last few years. You weren’t sure you would get used to that. 

“I am glad you like them. I was hoping you would.” He came to stand beside you as you fluffed out the flowers to fill the vase better. “I thought of you when I picked them.” His hand settled at the small of your back as you turned to look him. 

“I love them.” Leaning in, you kissed his cheek. “You’re very sweet. Don’t worry. I won’t tell a soul.”

Loki laughed before pulling you in for a proper kiss. He kept it brief and you groaned when he pulled back. “Now, now, darling. We have reservations for dinner and I don’t want to keep our driver waiting.”

“Driver?”

“Yes. I am unfamiliar with the mortal form of transportation. I would have found a carriage but I’m told those are harder to come by in this city and tend to only work around a park of some kind.”

You couldn’t help but giggle. “Maybe we can go riding on another date.”

“We shall have more of these?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“I certainly hope so.”

He guided you from your apartment and down to the waiting town car. It was much fancier than you would have thought for a god from another realm. You really shouldn’t have been surprised though. Loki seemed like to some of the finer things if his clothing was anything to go by. He was a perfect gentleman though and held the door out of your building for you and then opening the car door as well. You slid in and he slid in beside you. Once the door was closed, the car started moving. The partition was up so you didn’t see the driver. Not that it mattered to you. You cared more about the man beside you.

“Is this alright?”

“It’s perfect, really.” 

He slid his hand into yours, lacing your fingers together. It was nice to feel normal beside a god. That part hadn’t quite sunk in yet, either. But Loki seemed to be acclimating to the human ritual. “You will have to let me know if I am doing something wrong. I’m afraid things are quite different on Asgard.”

“How so?” You couldn’t help but be curious what it would have been like in his home.

“Well, for starters, I would have made a formal declaration before my father that I intended on courting you.” 

“Really?” Now it was your turn to raise an eyebrow. That was more than a little surprising. “You would have had to declare your intentions?”

“Indeed. As a Prince of Asgard, it would have been expected. Odin would have asked you to come before him and ask your intentions for his son.” Oh, that was even more unexpected. Loki chuckled at the expression on your face. “It would have been simple, really. From then on, we would have walked around the palace, sat in the gardens. I would have watched you work if that was what you did. Meals would have been spent together and it would have been expected that you only danced with me at formal gatherings. Unless my brother or father wished to dance with you. My mother would have spent a great deal of time with you as well, taken you under her wing.”

“That actually sounds kind of nice. On Earth, we date. We have dinner and see movies. Walks is something that happens and I can take you to Central Park if you’d like. Sometimes there are other things like plays or concerts or weekend getaways. But it’s often dinner and movies. Sometimes one person or the other makes the food, which is kind of nice, but it’s really rather boring compared to balls and feasts and royal gardens. I like the idea of your kind of courting as you call it. The closest we get here is when someone asks a father for his daughter’s hand in marriage. But even that’s not always done.”

“Oh, if I intended marriage, that would be an entirely different sort of ritual.” He brought your hand to his lips. “But fathers are involved. So are dowries.“

“Of course they are.” You shook your head but you did lean against him. It was surprisingly normal to by like this. It was a good feeling. 

The car pulled up outside a popular New York eatery. Loki exited first before helping you from the car. “Wow. This is a really nice place.” How was he going to pay for dinner?

“It came as a recommendation from Tony.”

“Tony Stark?!”

He kissed your temple before placing his hand on your back once more to guide you inside. “Yes. Apparently, from what he has been told about you from Captain Rogers and Sargent Barnes, he demanded that I treat you right. It was his suggestion to bring the flowers. He said he took care of everything so that you might have a night you deserved. Even if I didn’t deserve you.”

That comment made you your cheeks heat. A billionaire like Tony Stark not only knew you existed but he wanted you to be taken care of because of Steve and Bucky. That was actually very sweet. “Well, he’s wrong. Everyone deserves someone to care for them, to love them. Tony isn’t exactly a saint himself from what I have read in the papers.”

You stood in front of the hostess station. “Do you have a reservation?” the woman asked, doing a double take at Loki. She immediately turned flirtatious. “Because if you don’t have one, I’m sure I could work something out.”

“We do. It is under the name Stark.” Loki didn’t seem to care about how the woman was looking at him. 

“Oh! Wow. Mr. Stark called personally to make the reservation for you. You must be important.”

Loki chuckled and looked down at you. “Actually, she’s the important one. Mr. Stark barely tolerates me but he wanted to make sure I took good care of this beautiful creature beside me.” 

Now your cheeks could have cooked your dinner with how hot they were. But you saw the way the hostess was still looking at your date. Despite the fact that you were not a jealous person by nature, you did want to show her who Loki really cared about. You leaned in and brushed your lips over his. “You’re too sweet to me, Loki, dear.” 

He grinned and kissed you again, not one to shy away from public displays. “Anything for you, my darling.” It was if he read your mind and you didn’t really care if you were being more public that you usually were with your affections. It had the desired affect. 

The hostess cleared her throat and gathered two menus. “Please, if you’ll follow me to your table.” 

You managed to contain your giggle as Loki kept his arm around you and you were escorted through the restaurant. It was nice to be spoiled a little. The last time you had a date was a long time ago. And it hadn’t exactly been a great experience. He’d been a jerk and you had left him at the table with a drink poured on his head. Something told you tonight would be a very different evening.

The table that had been reserved for you was in a small private room. It was clearly intended to be a place where people with money could take someone special for an evening. It had it’s intended effect on you as well. The room had a table set for two with a few candles on the table itself. There was a wall full of glass so you could see the city around you and a number of candles on a low table against another wall. On that table also sat a pitcher of water and a bucket, presumably for wine of some kind.

The hostess stood beside the table, trying to make herself look more alluring. At least, that was what you supposed. It didn’t matter to you. Your attention was elsewhere. She looked disappointed when Loki pulled out your chair for you. “Allow me, dearest.”

“Thank you.”

“Your server will be in shortly with the special and to answer any questions.” The hostess left the room, clearly miffed that she did not get the attention she had wanted. 

When she was gone, you couldn’t help but giggle. “Well, her panties were in a twist.”

“I’m not sure I understand the expression, but she did seem rather perturbed.” As Loki sat, you couldn’t help but noticed that his movements were as graceful as they had been on the beach in your dreams. 

“Of course she did. You’re handsome and she thought that she could steal you away. Then you mentioned Stark and she assumed you had money and she was determined to steal you away. It was pouring off her in waves, the desperation.”

He reached for your hand and once again brought it to his lips. “I only have eyes for you, Y/N. Yes, it was fun to tease that poor woman, but I would never stray from you. It would be an insult, one that I would not stand to allow. While many kings have taken mistresses in the past, It was something that my mother would not stand for and I was raised to believe it was disrespectful.”

“I never really understood cheaters either. I’m lucky that I was never cheated on myself, but then again, I sense emotions as well as spirits. It makes sense that I would have wanted to get myself out of the relationship before it got that far because I could see it coming, more or less.”

“How any man could cheat on someone if they had found the right person to be with is beyond me. If you are that unhappy, break off the relationship. Don’t bring further shame to it.”

You smiled. “Not exactly first date conversation.”

“Forgive me. I’m not one to keep my thoughts to myself. Not with you at least.” He bowed his head towards you for a moment. “I have spent my life keeping myself guarded from those around me, certain they would use any sign of weakness against me. With you, I feel no such need to protect myself. With you, I wish to be open and honest. I would you to know all of me in the hopes that you will choose to continue to care for me.”

This was not the kind of thing you were used to, not in your previous relationships. No one laid out all their cards on the table from the get go. Secrets were kept. Bad habits hidden. It was the way of the world, wanting to put your best face forward to get someone to like you, to possibly love you. Loki didn’t seem to want that and for that you were grateful. “I appreciate that, Loki, truly. It’s just very different from what I have come to expect.”

“I should never wish to be expected,” he replied, mischief in his eyes. “You deserve to be spoiled daily, to have everything you could ever want. Yes, I am tease you, but it would only be to give you a greater reward later. Delayed gratification can be quite enjoyable.” He took a sip of the water that had been left on the table, letting go of your hand in the process, and you couldn’t help but hear the promise in those words. 

“I don’t need much, Loki. I’m a simple girl. This is lovely, really, but I’m happy eating at a diner or cooking at home. I’ve never been one for fancy things.”

“Did not your parents take you to the Hamptons? I have been told that is the spot for many well to do people to enjoy a holiday.”

You laughed. “Yes, they did. My mom came from money and they left me a pretty big trust fund when they passed, but my dad grew up simple. They made sure I was never too spoiled. My father was a renowned chef. He taught me how to cook and to keep a proper kitchen. He taught me hard work and to use my gifts to the best of my ability.”

“And what did your mother teach you?”

“To be kind. So many people need help that we shouldn’t look down on them because they have less than us. It’s why I give my time to those who need it. Sure, I could make a fortune pandering to those who would pay me as a medium but why should I? I have more than enough to live on. I enjoy what I do at the cafe. It’s helping people in its own way. I don’t need the paycheck. It isn’t what brings me satisfaction.”

“No, I don’t suppose it would be. I remember being with you in your apartment, watching as you spoke with people on the phone, how kind you were to them, how gracious with your time.”

“It’s about impacting someone’s life in a positive way. That’s all I could ever want.”

“All?”

You flushed again. “Well, all I would want from a job.”

“And not from a form of work?”

“Love. It’s not that crazy. I want to love and be loved. The crazy in love, the soft kind of Sunday morning love. The passionate, ‘I can’t keep my hands off you’ love. I want all of it.” It was your turn to sip at the water. When you glanced back at him, Loki’s gaze was intense. You opted to glance down at the menu before you. “We should figure out what we want to eat. The waiter will be in here soon and I don’t like to be rude and make them come back and forth too many times.”

As if on queue, a young man entered the room. “Good evening. I understand you’re guests of Mr. Stark. Anything you require for the evening will be taken care of. Perhaps I can interest you in a bottle of wine? Or champagne?”

You turned to look at him, giving him a kind smile. “I think we need another minute to decide on food before we pick the wine.”

“The chef would also be willing to make you a tasting menu if you’d like. We would bring wine to compliment each course.”

Glancing over at Loki, you saw he hadn’t touched the menu at all. “I think that would be a lovely idea. Keep the evening a surprise.” 

“Alright. I’m game. I don’t have any food allergies.” You handed the menu over. It was a lot easier to let the chef decide what you should eat and let you focus on the man across from you. 

“Very good. And you, sir?”

“None.”

“Excellent. I shall bring the first course shortly and a glass of champagne to start.” With that, he left you alone once more. 

“What is the fascination with this champagne?” Loki asked, taking you hand again. 

“It’s a fancy drink. Often served for special occasions for most people, but for the rich, it’s more common. There are lots of different times and I believe it’s only technically champagne if the grapes are from a specific area in France. But I only know a little about wine.”

“I don’t think Midgardian culture will ever stop surprising me.”

“Funny how you didn’t learn much about us before attempting to rule.” You gave his fingers an affectionate squeeze, not trying to call him out for his previous actions.

“No, I suppose that was another mistake I made.”

“But you can make up for them now.”

“And how would you propose I do that?”

“Do good in this world. Help the Avengers. Be kind fo strangers. I don’t know. But be the good person I know you to be, the man your mother wanted you to be. Do that, and I know you will make amends.” Drawing his fingers to your lips, you gave them a soft kiss. 

Loki stood quickly and pulled you from your chair. “I do not believe this would count as first date talk either.”

Laughing, you let him pull you into his arms and he began to dance with you. “No, it’s not. But neither is dancing to no music.” With a wave of his hand, a soft melody began to play and you shook your head. “Never mind then.”

“I am quite fond of dancing. It is an excellent way to get to know how someone moves, how they think.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss below your ear. “It is also an excellent way to tease one’s partner.”

You shivered against him. “I suppose it is.” It didn’t help that he chuckled, the sound low in his throat as you were swayed back and forth. You rested your head against his chest, the sound of his heartbeat beneath your ear. It made you smile that it seemed to be beating fast around you. Neither of you paid any attention when the server returned with the drinks, nor did you notice when he smiled to himself as he left. 

“Forgive me, my darling, but I have to ask. It has been weighing on me since you came to me on the balcony.”

“What is it?” you asked, glancing up at him.

“Why did you forgive me? I have been a monster for a long time, longer than I care to admit. And yet, you, this gracious and stunning woman, have chosen to have me in your life. That knowledge is staggering.”

Leaning up, you kissed him, slowly. He held you closer and you used your mouth to tell him without words that you thought him special, someone you wanted in your life despite all of the things that he’d done. It didn’t matter to you. You stopped moving to the music and he cupped your face with both his hands. His touch was gentle as he kissed you. This was much simpler than words, than trying to find ones you didn’t know to describe how you felt about him, how you’d felt about him for some time now. 

When he broke the kiss, he left his forehead against yours. Your eyes had fallen closed at some point, and, for the moment, you let them stay that way. It wasn’t until he kissed the tip of your nose that you looked up at him again. “That is not a real answer, Y/N.”

“I know. But it was easier to do that than fail to find a way to describe it.” You kissed him again, but far briefer. “You have good in you, Loki. I believe that. You wouldn’t have saved me or come to me for as long as you did without that being there. The way you speak of your mother, I know she saw it too. We have both experienced loss, had to prove those in our lives wrong about what they believed of us. I forgave you because I couldn’t imagine you not in my life and because while what you did was a bit of a betrayal of trust, you would never do anything to hurt me. We can move on from here.”

“I love you,” he murmured, covering your mouth with his own before you could respond to him. You slid a hand into his hair and kept him there, loving this moment for what it was: the beginning of something new, something precious. Something you would protect with your life.  
“I love you too.”

By the time the first course had arrived, you had been throughly kissed and you were breathless. But you weren’t embarrassed to be caught kissing him. You were in love. You had both admitted that and you wanted to shout it from the rooftops. It didn’t matter about his past because he wanted to make his future a better one. That had to mean something.

The food was delicious and you made a mental note to thank Tony Stark for helping Loki spoil you. It wasn’t something you needed all the time. That wasn’t the kind of woman you were. But it was nice to be treated like a princess every once in a while. The car drove you back to your apartment, and you stayed nestled against Loki, letting him press soft kisses along the column of your throat. You let out a disappointed whine when the car stopped and the driver indicated you had reached you apartment. 

“I shall walk you to your door.” Loki extended a hand and helped you from the car before tucking your hand in the crook of his elbow. You smiled as he held the door open for you and escorted you to the elevator. While you wanted to have him press you against the wall of the box as it rose to your floor, it was for the best. You didn’t want to give whoever watched the security tapes a show. 

As you pulled our your key, you let go of his arm and he stood behind you. “Do you want to come in?”

“No, I think it’s best I leave you for the night.” He leaned in and kissed you breathless, one hand at the nape of your neck, the other gentle at your waist.

“Tease,” you murmured as he pulled back. “You promised me Valhalla.”

“And I shall give it to you, my beloved. But not tonight.” He kissed you again, softer, sweeter. “As much as I wish to ravage you, I want to court you as well. Please allow me to do so. Let me show you how you would be treasured on Asgard as one who holds the heart of a prince.”

“I suppose I can’t argue with that. But you’re still a tease.”

“No, darling. This is a tease.” He caged you against the door to your apartment and caught your mouth. The press of his mouth against yours, the weight of his body against yours was a firm promise of what would happen when you finally tore one another’s clothes off. He pulled your hips to his and you could feel the hardened length of him against your core. There was no denying that this was difficult for him, that he wanted you. You sighed into his kiss and he slid his tongue along yours, exploring your mouth. Something tingled along your leg, caressing upwards as he ravaged your mouth. It teased along your inner thigh and then it was as if his mouth was against your clothed center. You gasped, your fingers tightening in his hair and against the fabric covering his body. He was using magic and you felt your body shudder against his. 

Loki pulled away with a low chuckle. “That is just a taste, a promise of more to come. When I take you to Valhalla, my darling one, I will keep you there for hours. Perhaps days, if you will let me.”

“Wow,” you breathed, your desire for him more than peaked now. 

“Sweet dreams, dearest.” He kissed you, a brief brush compared to the ones you had shared before. “I shall call upon you tomorrow.”

“Alright. I’ll be home all day.”

“Wonderful. Perhaps you will allow me to take you out again?”

A smile spread over your lips. “I would like that a lot.”

“Think of me in your dreams,” he murmured, kissing below your ear before taking two steps back. Loki didn’t leave until you entered your apartment and locked your door. It amused him that your legs seemed to be a touch weakened because of his actions. He couldn’t remember the last time he was this happy. And neither could you.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Nightmares  
> Notes: I’m working hard to get the next part ready to post ASAP but, things have been in a little tricky IRL. Hope you guys enjoy this one!

As much as you had been hoping to spend the night with your new beau, it was probably for the best that you take it a little slow. You didn’t know everything about the man. God. Whatever. That part was getting a little confusing. It was something you would have to talk to him about. But that would come later. 

You’d like to say that sleep came easily that night, but Loki had riled you up more than you expected from just a few kisses. It took a long hot bath and wishing he was there with you before you could actually feel a little bit sleepy. A cup of tea and several chapters of the book you were reading helped too and you eventually drifted off. 

The sleep you had was not peaceful. Instead of dreaming of your beach with Loki beside you, you dreamed of a dark forest. It was unfamiliar to you and you knew that you were being followed as you walked amongst the trees. There was a familiar sound but you couldn’t place where you knew it from. It was a mechanical whine and it bothered you that you didn’t know what it was. No matter where you looked, you couldn’t see anything out of place. But you knew something was out there. 

A darkness spread around you and you quickened your pace. There had to be a way out of the woods. The trees pressed in about you and you felt your breath increased, your heart racing. You couldn’t seem to make much headway, the trees coming closer and closer to you. You opened your mouth but you couldn’t scream. You couldn’t made a sound. It was terrifying. It felt as if vines were wrapping around your legs and you fought to free yourself. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go down. Someone laughed behind you and you felt true terror at the sound. It was not human.

With a cry, you bolted upright in bed. You body was covered in a sheen of sweat and your heart continued to race in your chest. The sheets had tangled around your legs and you took several deep breaths to steady yourself. Shifting, you freed yourself and tucked your legs beneath you. You were still scared, still shaking with the fear of whatever was watching you in the dream. It felt so real. Pressing your hand to your chest, you could feel the pounding of your heart. 

There was a knock at your door and you nearly jumped out of your skin. It was the middle of the night. Who would be knocking at your door and how had they gotten in when your building had a door code? Grabbing your robe, you tied it tight around your waist as you went to the door. Looking through the peep hole in your door, you let out a sigh of relief before opening the door. “What are you doing here?”

Loki entered your apartment and wrapped you up in his arms. “I could sense your terror. I would have appeared in your room, but I recall you saying something about knocking when I came to visit.” 

Despite how you had woken and the worry from hearing someone at your door, you couldn’t help but laugh against his chest. Looking up at him, you smiled and leaned in to kiss his cheek. “Thank you, Loki. I don’t know how you knew I needed you, but I’m glad you’re here.”

He lead you into your living room and sat you down on the couch. “What was it?”

“A dream. A really weird dream.” He sat beside you and you turned to face him a bit more. “I don’t know where I was but there was someone watching me. Who ever it was felt malicious and I couldn’t escape.”

He pulled you close and you relaxed a bit into his embrace. Though you had never felt the need for another person when you were scared, you couldn’t deny the comfort you drew from having him there. Loki had been a constant in your life for longer than you realized. “I was more than a little concerned. Never have I felt that kind of terror from you, Y/N.” He trailed his fingers through your hair and you closed your eyes. This was something you had been missing in your life. He was the kind of man that could be your partner. That thought lingered in your mind.

“It just felt so real.” With a sigh, you lifted your head. “I’ve never had a dream like that before. I couldn’t stay asleep when it was that kind of thing. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“You needn’t, darling. You should let me soothe you.”

You laughed and shook your head. “I feel better now that I’m awake. Promise. It was just freaky to wake up feeling like someone was watching me.”

“It wasn’t me.”

“I know, Loki. I trust you. Part of me wonders if I should, but I trust you.” Resting your head against him again, you closed your eyes. “I’m glad you’re here, but you’re going to have to explain how you could sense my emotions.”

“Even I’m uncertain of that, little one. Perhaps you were projecting them at me because of our connection. Perhaps I am just tied to you now. I do not know.” He stroked your hair, pulling your legs across his lap and tucking you into his side. It was more than a little soothing. “I do know that I feel at peace when I am with you. That has always been true, even when you thought me a spirit.”

“I feel the same way.”

For minutes you didn’t want to count, the two of you curled up on the couch, as if you were a normal couple instead of a medium and a god. It was something you had been lacking and no one would have blamed you for falling asleep tucked against the man who would give his life for yours without any hesitation. 

All the way, his eyes were on you two. And he smiled.


End file.
